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2011-10-18, 12:10 a.m.

Been feeling really suffocated. I hope I can sleep >< having difficulties sleeping again recently..

I miss so many people. My nanny, Kaiyuan, old friends.. I miss the old Sapph, miss my childhood, miss my once-happy family, miss the days when I cried only because I grazed my knee, when goodbye meant seeing each other again the next day. Whatever was I thinking of, when I prayed all day and all night to grow up quickly, I really don't know.

Still very much in love with Secret Garden, hope this wears off soon. Can't be smiling to myself every time in school. I look like some retard. Lolol. I hope depression isn't hereditary. Cus if I don't get it now, I'm gonna get it sometime later in life. Everyone on my mom side's diagnosed with depression. Sigh.

I'm tired. Please let me sleep. I hate being tired and not being able to sleep because I'm worrying and thinking about so many things.

Why is life so hard, even when I don't have to fret about food and lodging. I don't get it.

Praying for a good day tmr at school ^^

Muchloves,
Yihui <3

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